Somtimes God uses billboards

God uses the most bizarre ways to get my attention some times. I don't know if that's a good thing or if it just shows how clueless I can be. This particular incident that I am writing about occurred maybe a month or so ago. It was an unusual grey, cold day. The trees were starting to turn green but they weren't quite there yet. I had been inside all day and was dying to get out and just breath in the fresh, crisp air. I had been stuck inside all day and with little to do my mind couldn't help but wander to the thought that we were still waiting for that "change our life" phone call from our adoption agency.

By now, every time my cell phone rang I hoped, no I pleaded that it would be the call from our adoption agency telling us that we had a beautiful baby born and we could go ahead and pack our bags and pick him or her up. However, on this particular day my phone hadn't rang at all. I tried not to keep checking it. In fact, I even left it in the other room because I was so annoyed with how obsessive I  had become with making sure it was within eye sight, and then making sure the volume was up, oh and then checking it to make sure it was turned on.  I was sick of feeling like my child was so far away and all I could do to bring him/her closer to me was literally wait for a phone to ring. I couldn't take it anymore, I had to get a break.

So as I left our neighborhood and made my usual way past the post office and the little elementary school I turned left at the light and that's where I saw it. A new billboard, not even a mile away from my house. The billboard read, "You're closer to your child then you think". As I drove past I thought, now that's strange. I don't remember seeing that before. The billboard didn't even have a name or a phone number for an organization or advertisement company. It just had a picture of a lady holding a child with the simple phrase, "You're closer to your child then you think". That billboard has been up now for over a month and I thank God every time I pass it. I don't know why, but every time I read it, it gives me just enough push to continue on.

Thank you Jesus for not giving up on me. You defiantly have my attention, hopefully next time you won't have to use the billboard! 

"no shelly...get out of bed..."

This has happened a few times since we've started the adoption process, when I am completely exhausted and I fall asleep and start having happy dreams that are suddenly interrupted by this feeling that I need to get up and read my bible. It's so weird. Well, this happened to me this morning around 7:00am. I woke up  and just laid there for about 15 minutes trying to get back to sleep. I felt like God was saying, "no shelly... get out of bed and pick up my word. I have something to show you". So silly me, I thought I could hide from God trying to wake me up so I just shrugged it off as my lack of sleep, and didn't listen and instead laid in bed for another miserable 15 minutes staring at the ceiling. After laying there for a half hour total with no success of getting back to sleep, I jumped out of bed and grabbed my Bible. Right now I am studying John and that's what I was planning on reading. However, I opened my Bible and felt I needed to read Isaiah 60. I started reading and was amazed at how God's words just started jumping out of the page at me. I was amazed. Once again, God knew that I needed to hear that particular piece of His word more then I needed sleep. Silly me for not listening the first time. This is what I read:

Isaiah 60:1-5   "Arise, shine, for your light has come, and the glory of the LORD rises upon you... the LORD rises upon you and his glory appears over you. Nations will come to your light... “Lift up your eyes and look about you... your sons come from afar, and your daughters are carried on the hip."

God knew that before I went to sleep last night I was fighting my own fears about adoption and the thought of how in the world a little white girl from NC was going to find her beautiful baby in this HUGE world. My mind was racing, trying to think of what I needed to do to make myself shine brighter then all the other thousands of adoptive parents out there. This verse touched me, telling me that my light is not cutting it. The light I need can only come from the Lord. God has shined His light on me (and Eric) allowing some brave mom to make her way through the thousands of options for her baby and choose the place where her child is meant to be.

Thank you Jesus for knowing me better then I know myself and for always being my light in the darkness! Please protect the birth mother of our future child as she slowly makes her way toward us. Protect her from Satan's deception and schemes and please, please keep that baby safe.

**So funny story. Another time God woke me up was when we lived in OH. I was in the process of finding a job and felt really down from not having any success so I was trying to hide the sadness with sleeping the day away. Well anyway around 12pm I woke up and tried for a long time to go back to sleep and I just couldn't. So I decided to get up and start my day.  I sat down to do my devotions and opened my Bible (no joke) to Proverbs 6:9-11 which read, "How long will you lie there, you sluggard? When will you get up from your sleep? A little sleep, a little slumber, a little folding of the hands to rest— and poverty will come on you like a thief and scarcity like an armed man."  OUCH.. is all I can say to that!! :)

6 months +3 weeks update

So we've hit our 6 month +3 weeks (who's counting.. hehe) waiting mark so I decided to email our agency and get an update. :) Here is what they said:

"Hi Shelly, We are currently working with 4 birth mothers. Two have been matched and two are not quite ready to be matched. I would say that there has been several birth mothers interested in your family. We have even had a few that narrowed it down to you and one other family but ultimately, they chose the other family. Most recently that has been because they wanted a family very close by. We do have more families now who are open to any race. We typically only show 3 to 4 portfolios to any birth mother at one time. If we have even more families who meet her criteria, then we choose only the families based on the length of time they have been waiting. That way, the families who have been waiting longer are given priority. I hope that makes sense. I know the wait is always hard. I hope to have some good news for you soon!"

I was encouraged by this. At least there's interest. :) Happy Friday everyone!

Our Adoption Journey

Wow! Have I really not blogged since September of 2008! Sorry. No wonder people lost hope. Well, I've decided to take a different turn for my blog and I'm wanting to focus more on adoption. I thought about changing the title, but honestly learning to be content is a *H*U*G*E* part of adoption.

My blogs purpose:
1. Timeline for adoption process
2. A way to get information for prospecitve adoptive parents, or people who are just curious how adoption works.
3. A place for you to see a raw, unedited view of how adoption can be an eye opening and heart breaking experience.
4. Update my family and friends who are wondering where we're at and how we're doing.