She's back by popular demand! :)

Well due to a few threats and a few people sending hate emails and messages I'm going to try HARDER and keeping this updated better. Actually life has slowed down a little for Eric and I now, so maybe I will have more time. I get the question a lot, "what do you do at home all day?" Well I can't really answer that, but all I can say is that I keep busy! It seems like there is always something going on. For example today, I went and worked out than I laid out by the pool for 3 hours!! HAHA That is keeping busy! :) :) What a wonderful husband I have that will slave away at work while his wife sits by the pool sipping her iced tea and reading a book (thanks Alicia for the book).

Speaking of the pool, I have to tell you a funny story that happened today. So this lady gets up and goes into the bathroom and she comes out yelling about how she can't believe that she is burnt. (oh first, this lady was not tan, but not pale). So then she sees me laying there and she comes over and says word for word, "well, you better either put some sunscreen on or go inside because you are a LOT whiter then me, and I'm burnt." I was cracking up! It makes me laugh thinking about how some people just have no tact! HAHA:) It's all good, I know I'm white!!


Last night we had our small group and it went really well. It was at a different location and not as many people showed up, so I thought it would be fun, but maybe not as deep as normal. I was wrong! We talked about the Holy Spirit and it was great! I learned so much from all my friends. We also had a good time talking about why Christians are overweight! :) We decided that it's because of all the potlucks and carry-ins that you have at church. If you are Nazarene you definitely know what I'm talking about. So we all decided that we're going to do something about it. Instead of going out to eat as our special event for the month, we're going to go to the park and play volleyball or to the zoo and walk around and get some exercise! :) I'm excited!


Something else that we talked about last night was the amazing peace that only God can give. One of our group members is in AA and he talked about how you can just see it on the peoples faces when they talk about their "higher power" giving them peace. That made me think, I hope people can see something different about me. You know, with everything that has been going on lately, God has give me a peace. There are some days that I feel it more then others, but I know it's there. I'm so thankful that we serve such an awesome and powerful God. I'm so thankful that even if I'm in over my head and I feel like my world is falling apart, my God can lift me up and help me put the pieces back together!

Well tonight Eric and I are taking it easy and watching a movie and boiling peanuts! :) He found it on the Internet, so we decided to give it a try. :) Here are a few pictures from our fun weekend at my parents! :)

Long overdue update

Eric and I had a really good weekend. We didn't have any plans, and that is just the way we liked it!! :) Actually, Friday Eric surprised me after he got off work with a Bonsai tree and a card. He is so sweet! :) He knew that Mother's Day would be kind of a difficult time and I might not feel included, so he wanted to make me feel special and apart! :) Than he took me out to Red Lobster! YUM!! :)

On Saturday we went to the zoo and had a really great time. :) After the zoo we went to this really cool place that actually Eric's mom discovered. It's called the Velvet Ice Cream Mill. It's awesome! Although, I was a little disappointed with their nature trail. We had a really good day Saturday! It was nice to be outside for most of the day.

I was a little worried about Sunday, with it being Mother's Day and all. However, we had an awesome church service and spent most of the afternoon with Eric's family. Our pastor did a great job of acknowledging and incorporating into his sermon different heartaches that people may be experiencing on Mother's Day. It was good.

Monday was fun too!! My friend Alicia and I went and got pedicures and had a really relaxing time! Although it took me about 30 minutes to decide on a color, I finally picked HOT PINK! HEHE It's fun!! :)


**Well, right now there is so much going on. I don't really want to talk about the details, but God has been revealing some important and life changing things to us. Just please continue to pray for us! :) Some exciting news, Eric and I are looking at taking about a week and a half trip to Florida in the Fall! It has been exciting looking up places and things to do while we are there! This vacation is much needed and September seems so far away!

Sorry I don't really have anything important to write about. Just wanted to update you all since I had some angry commenter's on my last posting! (J/K!!! :) )

The Voice of Truth

This has been a hard month. I know it's only May 4th, but May has been unusually disappointing. Normally around this time, all of my stored up happiness and excitement starts to spill out and I experience real enjoyment. I am normally out running around looking for a park to go to or things for Eric and I to do outside. However, not today, or the past few days, for that matter. All that I have felt like doing is sitting inside and staring out the patio door watching everyone else outside enjoying themselves. This could also be because every time I go outside my neighbor wants to talk... not just the typical "hi, how are you", but the meaningful, deep, what am I doing with life conversations. :)

I feel like there are so many things in life that I could be excited about, but I can't. I can't because I have to protect myself. That's what everyone tells me, at least! I'm just getting so tired of constantly having my protection guard up. I want to love someone unconditionally and know that they are mine and I don't have to give them back. I know this sounds totally selfish, but I'm just trying to be honest. I'm hurt to think that I have to raise money, not just a little money but thousands of dollars to have a child and then wait months not knowing what's happening to my child, while someone else goes into the hospital and pays $200 and within 72 hours walks out the door with their baby. I'm just confused! I just feel so helpless! I'm also not saying that by having your own child you are less of a person or not as strong, but it's just different.

I'm sorry if this seems like a depressing post, I just had to share! I've been feeling this way for a while and just needed to get it off my chest. It's actually kind of funny because I just heard the song "The Voice of Truth" by Casting Crowns. I think that during all these times of struggles I've been letting Satan get me down. It's just hard to think positive when there are so many negative things going on around you. Please just continue to pray for me and for Eric. I know this has been a hard time for Eric too. He's had to deal with all of this plus deal with an emotional wife that cries at the sound of the phone ringing! :) :)

Thank you guys for reading this. Seriously, it means so much to me to know that people actually care to read my blog! I love you guys! :)