Monday, October 28, 2013

Our Adoption Story

In the beginning I was excited as I sat on the floor of the bathroom waiting to see if the EPT would give me two lines or one. Two lines meant that you were pregnant, and one meant keep trying maybe next month. Soon these months turned into years and eventually I stopped taking the tests because I couldn't handle the disappointment anymore. It was heartbreaking to wait so anxiously to see if the second line would appear and sometimes I thought I saw it, but I didn't. After trying to get pregnant for 4 years without any success Eric and I finally decided to see an infertility specialist. This brought much heartache yet also confirmation that for this time God did not have it in his plans for us to have biological children. We were told by the specialist that it would cost nearly $25,000 for us to do in-vitro and there was a CHANCE that we could get pregnant. No guarantee. I remember leaving the office crying because I thought my dreams of having a family were over. I had always wanted to be a mom and this was the day that my dreams came unraveled.

After several months of praying and believing that God wouldn't have given us this desire to be parents if he didn't want us to have a child, we finally started the adoption process. This was in July 2010. By September we had all of our paperwork turned in and we were officially waiting! This was a HUGE day! This meant that all our work was done, now we had to trust that our agency was fighting for us and that God had his hand in the situation. A lot of people compare this time to being pregnant. You know you have a baby, but you have to wait months and months before he or she will arrive. 

On January 6th, 2011 we received a call from our agency saying that we had been picked by a birth mother and she was giving birth to a baby boy THAT NIGHT! The agency told us to go ahead and pack our bags and get a few things for the baby and prepare to come to South Carolina in the morning. Eric and I were so excited! We could barely move. We just stood there in the office of our house hugging and crying because we couldn't believe it had finally happened. We called our family and a few friends and told them the great news, we raced off to the store and bought a few baby items and a new video camera to take with us. That night we went to sleep with our suitcases, diaper bag and empty car seat sitting by the door. 

In the morning I hadn't heard from the agency so I decided to call. The social worker told us that the mom had given birth that morning and had decided to keep her baby. She said that if anything changed she would call us and let us know. I sunk onto the floor and wept! I was so heartbroken that I didn't have it in me to even call our family and friends so I just sent them a text saying the birth mom changed her mind, please pray for us. 

The following months were very difficult. Friends kept announcing they were pregnant, there were tons of baby showers. It was a constant reminder that I still didn't have what my heart so desired. 

In August I had had enough of the waiting. This is one thing about me, I have a really difficult time sitting still and waiting. In fact, let's just be honest and say that I suck at it. I emailed a friend who worked for an adoption agency and just vented to her all of my frustrations. She immediately replied back and said that I should contact Christian Adoption Services also known as CAS(a different agency then we were currently working with). I knew the rules about switching agencies and knew that if we did decide to switch we would most likely loose thousands of dollars. However, something inside me told me to make the call. So that day (told you I don't like to wait) I called CAS and explained to them our adoption situation and what we were open to. They said they would talk things over and get back with me. 

I didn't hear back for several days so on August 11th I called them (now you see my impatience). I ended up speaking to the director who told me about a little girl who had been born at 26 weeks and was currently in the NICU. She asked if this was something we would be interested in and I told her yes. On August 13th the director drove 2 1/2 hours to talk Face to Face with Eric and I about the little girl.  She told us that she was healthy but very tiny. She told us a few agency rules and lastly we asked her about the cost of the adoption. Remember we knew that by switching agencies we would loose thousands of dollars...$7,000 to be exact. When we asked her the cost of the adoption she gave us the exact number that we were expecting to pay but decided to take off $7,000 without even knowing that we were loosing that exact amount from the other agency. Let's just say that when she told us that number, there were tears everywhere. We knew at that moment that God had his hand in this situation and that this tiny little girl was our daughter.


On August 17th we got to meet our sweet Marlee for the first time. It was the best day of my life. I was so overwhelmed by God's goodness to me. I felt so undeserving to be this little girls mama. Marlee Joy was born August 4, 2011. She weighed 2 lbs 1 ounce. Here is a picture of the first time we laid eyes on her. 




Our sweet daughter is two years old now and we still feel just as blessed and undeserving as the day we met her in the NICU. She is truly our sweet little miracle and such a great example of how God cares about the desires of our hearts and wants to give us good things.












1 comment:

Laura Mayfield said...

Shelly I love you!!!!!! What an amazing story. I didn't know all of these details, and am so blessed to read what all you guys went through. *Tears*